Friday, August 14, 2020

Iris, Like The Song

How to tell if you are reading a story by Jennifer Lee Rossman, a quick and easy checklist:

* it was based on a song, and keeps shoving references to the song in your face lest you forget
(check! Iris, by the Goo Goo Dolls, and also the Sixpence None The Richer song Kiss Me)

* the story was untitled until right before it was submitted, and you can tell because the title is a little bit silly
(check! Iris, Like The Song.)

* the concept can best be summarized by putting two words together that should not go together
(Time Pirates! Pirates, but time!)

* the main character is queer and adorkable and probably autistic
(Um excuse you, it's called writing what you know)

* there is no reason to quote Jurassic Park, and yet…
(there is always a reason to quote Jurassic Park)

* specifically a quote from Dr. Ian Malcolm
(wait, are you suggesting other characters in that movie say things?)

* there is also no reason to bring up the feud between Thomas Edison and Nikola Tesla…
(LISTEN. Thomas Edison was an asshole and the world needs to know)

* random Tesla fangirling
(are you referring to the incredibly accurate statement about Tesla being a sexy bad boy of science because HOW DARE)

* it is abundantly clear that the author grew up in the 90s
(if you play a spot the 90s references drinking game, you will absolutely be drunk by page 2)

* a twist ending
(what like you didn't watch Twilight Zone marathons every holiday for your entire childhood until the zeitgeist of the show was absorbed into your soul and became an integral part of your very being? Loser)

* the author made a point of mentioning complicated physics concepts to prove she knows her stuff, but throws it all away in the very next paragraph because plausible science ruins the fun
(no comment)

* the author did way too much research for one sentence but no one except her will ever appreciate all that hard work
(that's like… every sentence, dude, you need to be more specific)


So… Yeah. If you want to read possibly the most on brand Jennifer Lee Rossman story I've ever written, you might want to check out Iris, Like The Song, part of Tales From The Pirate's Cove

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